How to Move On


Have you ever been so in love with someone and they just won't get it together? You don't want to leave...okay, one more chance. I'll give them one more chance. *whispers* but that one chance turns to two and maybe even three. 

You might not even be in love. It could be a girlfriend that you just enjoy spending time with, but she gossips so much that it's no longer entertaining but a judgment session. 

Sometimes we have to move on from situations and people that we love, especially if they aren't respecting limits and boundaries that we set. 

1.    Set limits with people. 

{C}2.    {C}If crossed, there should be a plan of action.

{C}3.    {C}The plan of action should have a natural consequence.

When you set your limits and boundaries, you are essentially creating a contract: I do not accept XYZ. If XYZ were to occur, then I will have to do ABC. 

Natural consequences aren't to be used as threats. You have to hold up to your end of the bargain and know that most people don't respond well to threats. Plus empty threats reinforce unwanted behaviors.

 You are going to run into people who are going to break this contract

Some over and over and better not let anyone disrespect you like that. Subsequently, people will try to push your limits and not because they are horrible people who just like to push your buttons. Although there are some real jerks out there. The average person may just feel like their agenda is greater than yours. And for this difference, forgiveness is possible.

I'm a sucker for second chances and forgiveness, but I'm nobody’s fool. Hunay, please doesn’t play the fool. I truly believe I have a masters in moving on. Back in high school my male BFF nicknamed me "keep it moving", and shortened it to "moving." Life stands still for none of us. We all have to keep it moving, even when we don't want to. Forgiveness will change your life.

We need to learn to let go. We need to be able to forgive, so we can move on and be happy.

Moving on is usually bitter sweet. It's as if we're forcing ourselves to give up on people and situations. And sometimes that's exactly what we need to do, to experience happiness. Holding onto situations and people that don't want involvement is like pouring alcohol on an open wound. 

You don't need permission to move on. You don't even have to tell the other part(ies) if you think that will cause additional issues. It's not about them.

1.    Determine if after forgiveness will the relationship or situation continue causing you distress, and (or) going against your personal values.

2.    Commit to letting go and moving on- it won’t be overnight.

3.    Be at peace and remain in the present- you can’t keep thoughts of the situation. Moving on is moving past the situation and forward from the past.