Black female addicted to retail
My shoe budget was higher than my grocery and savings budget...yeah I know her. If there was a sale at a department store, I knew before the employees.
Shopping addiction is not even touching it.
Retail therapy...if I was upset...I shopped. If I was bored...I shopped. If I was happy...I shopped. If I was hungry...I went to Nordstroms and would shop afterwards.
My most recent frequented sites were fashion sites and my favorite stores. My closet became a store for my friends. I wouldn't wear things twice, plus so many items still have tags on them. I will note I didn't use credit cards to purchase anything during retail therapy as I don't believe in debt.
So what I've noticed in working with minority women that are very similar to the old me. We would rather invest $500-$1000 on a purse (*insert your fancy*) than invest in ourselves.
Investing in ourselves could be coaching, personal trainer, gym membership, a course not covered by financial aid, real estate. Whatever it is...we hold ourselves back waiting for someone else to give us the opportunity. Choose yourself! There are new rules! And guess who makes the rules? You do! You know you have the power to transform your life into every beautiful detail you sit around and dream about. But guess what cupcake? Deferring those dreams because you don’t invest in yourself is such a waste of purpose.
We might say, “when the rate goes down, I'll sign up,” or “it's just too expensive.”
Truly evaluate the things that you wanted to do to further yourself but you didn't invest because you believed that you couldn't afford it.
When I was in grad school, I went to see a therapist. Granted my insurance paid for majority of the costs and I paid the co-pay. But I wanted to evaluate the process and to ensure I was “healed” enough to heal others. Going to that appointment actually helped me with my counseling skills, because now I know how intimidating it can feel going to the first appointment. But that’s another post entirely.
Invest time in yourself. Research things. Google is my BFF, but so is the library. I read about two books a week. Even with my hectic schedule, because there’s so much I need to learn about the things I want to improve on. The library is free unless you forget to return the books. I probably have 22 books checked out right now from business, health, cookbooks, to self-help. Just as I make “me time” to pamper myself, I have time where I invest in myself.
Monetary investments can be scary. I know! I really do. I recently invested in a coach. What a coach has a coach?!? Yes! I’ve learned ALL the greats have coaches. We all need mentors in various areas. I can say I’m an amazing coach, mentor, and therapist, but I don’t know everything. Sometimes I even get discouraged, and depending on the area(s) of your life coaches are there for you. If Michael Jordan and Lebron James can take instruction from a coach, I am definitely coachable. You may not need coaching in any area of your life, but I’m sure there are things that you are deferring that could get you where you truly want in life. Don’t be that lady addicted to retail and make excuses for why you are unable to invest in yourself.
Successful people don’t wait – they spend money, time, and effort on their own growth because they know without doubt it will pay off – for themselves and everyone around them. Failing to invest in yourself is just another form of self-limiting behaviors.